JaneThangPoetry, Kelbells Direction

It Happens

Seeing what we could have had made me envious,
But I was beginning to become blind to the reason we didn’t work in the first place.
The truth…The truth…
It took time for me to come to terms with it.
In my eyes I deserved to be treated like a queen.
I was not to be placed on a back-burner for another individual.
I thought that the calls should have been made and messages should have been sent and I deserved all the attention.
My smart comments should be countered with a cute comeback and life would be peachy.
I’ve realized that not everyone lives in my world. I didn’t realize you were going to give me the time slot you gave me. I was 10th in your book.
1. God
2. family
3. work
4. whatever the heck you did in your free time without me
5. sleep
6. homeboys
7. your drama
8. car
9. phone
10. then ME
What?? Really??!!! I was number 10…well at least it felt like I was.
I really only knew half of you.
The idea of me being a queen in your life was never a priority to you.
I was shut down and in a position with no position
Why did I think there was happiness?
Young and stupid to think at this age anything was going to be real.
Young and smart to know how I should be treated no matter the age.
I was smart to know how I wanted to be treated but lingering to see if I will ever get treated that way.
A waste of time.
It never happened.
Was I happy with you?? NO!!
My emotions blinded my perspective.
I fell for a fictitious image of you that never existed.
I built this dream man in my mind that I thought it was you and it exploded in my face.
What made me come to terms with reality?
I’m sitting here thinking about a fool that isn’t thinking about me.
This guy had my life in a whirlwind and he was on to the next chick.
I was sweating a dude that was minuscule.
I was hiding from true happiness because hurt bit me.
Oh it bit me.
But a power lifted me…


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